Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
