i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
