Rock
Scissors
Fuck
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
