Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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