porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
