I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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