i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
