I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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