Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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