dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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