We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize