As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
