Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
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