oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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