We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
