Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
