Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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