yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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