he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize