Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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