I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
