There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I could make wine with my vomit
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
