he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
