4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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