Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
