you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
