i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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