My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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