please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
