so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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