Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
