so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
