So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
