5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
