The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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