I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
