Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
