Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
