brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
