my sisters under your porch take her home
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
