So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
the day after is always just damage control
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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