...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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