Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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