Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
