How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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