I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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