We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I love how my cats smell like pot.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
