I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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