It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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