google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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